You know when something is alive in your consciousness and you see that thing everywhere?
Like when you’re looking to buy a new car, and the one you’re considering suddenly becomes your neighbour at every red light?
Or maybe it’s learning, when you were binge-watching “Queer Eye,” how soaking red onions can decrease their flavour intensity and then seeing a bowl of floating red onion chunks at the pizza party you go to that night. That’s, of course, a totally random example that I’m not drawing from real life. At all. **Whistles. **Shifty-eyes…
Anyhoodles!
Or… maybe it’s a theme or concept. Recently, in my world, it’s been about choice. That idea has been showing up like mosquitoes on summer nights. It’s been coming up in all the courses and programs I’m studying, all the books I’m reading, the prayers I’m coming across, and conversations I’m having.
The universe is begging me to take note. For me, the best way to really integrate information is to write about it. And share it. Hence this fair article, where we lay our scene. Here are some of the tidbits that I’ve been learning.
1. Choice causes consequences.
(I love a little alliteration 😉 ).
Choice is action based. It differs from decisions, which happen at the level of thought and can be changed. Choice, since it involves an action, can’t be changed. Making choices, aka taking actions, require a bigger commitment that decision making.
The energy of the consequence reflects the energy of the choice. For example, say you do something out of obligation, then what you get back is more obligation. Let’s look at that more specifically. You reluctantly agree to help your friend move (the choice) and it takes hours longer than you expected (the consequence).
Or it can be more subtle. You wake up and the first thought you have is, “Ughh… I feel like garbage and I’m so exhausted. I’m not looking forward to this day at all.” All a choice. I bet you can picture what the day ends up being like. You’ve probably had many days like that. Intention matters.
Conversely, you set a boundary and opt out of brunch with the in-laws, and consequently, you enjoy a beautiful morning doing art on your deck. Here the energy of the choice and consequence is freedom.
Sometimes a choice is not acting. For example, the patient who recently admitted that she’d taken none of the steps we’d talked about at her last visit. That was her choice. It came with a consequence. Actually a few:
- She still doesn’t feel good, in fact now she’s worse off because…
- She feels embarrassed
- She’s questioning if naturopathic medicine is effective
- She’s projecting that doubt on me.
The energy of the choice was stagnant, and she consequently received no movement towards her goals.
And now I have a choice. I can be hurt. I can be mad. I can be offended.
I can be neutral. It’s my choice whether I take her choices personally.
Which generally, I’m not willing to do.
And this brings us to the 2nd way that this topic has been showing up for me lately.
2. You choose how you feel.
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Viktor E. Frankl (holocost survivor and author of A Man’s Search for Meaning).
I recently talked about choosing to be happy and how things changed for me.
The problem I see it that so many people are REACTING automatically to their triggers in life because of habitual, unconscious patterns, versus RESPONDING to them with awareness.
And you may think, “Well… if its a habit I can’t do anything about it anyways.”
Your choice to see it that way will come with the consequence of feeling triggered all the time. Why would you choose that?
The choice to react out of habit feels stressful to me compared to the CHOICE to respond with attention.
No one makes you feel anything. You’re choosing to feel what you feel.
Also, the way people act has nothing to do with you. The choices people make are not personal. They are based on their beliefs and programming.
So now with this awareness, you get to change. Try on a new response. Discover new consequences.
CHOICE IS LIFE.
“The way is simple. Every time you feel a stab of anger, realize you hold a sword above your head. And it will fall or be averted as you choose to be condemned or free. Thus does each one who seems to tempt you to be angry represent your savior from the prison house of death. And so you owe him thanks instead of pain.” – A Course In Miracles.
The third point I want to emphasize is:
3. You always have a choice.
Watch and catch your self when you say, “I don’t have a choice.” You always do. Always. The consequences may seem frightening but there is always a choice.
If you don’t believe this then you will remain a victim. When you acknowledge you have a choice, no matter how uncomfortable, you will gain responsibility and ultimately the power to change your circumstances, health, and life. POSITIVE CONSEQUENCES.
This is a big topic, and there is more to say on this. For now, I’ll leave you, having hopefully shifted your awareness. But that’s entirely up to you.
Here is a gentle trick you can start practicing:
- Recognize you’re triggered. This should be easy because you will feel mad or sad or icky.
- Tell yourself, “My reaction is a habit.”
- Continue, “Their behavior has nothing to do with me”
- Say, “I can choose a new way to feel.”
- Decide, “I choose to feel…”
- And then feel that thing for as long as you possibly can.
Please leave a comment below and let me know how you’ll take action (aka make a choice) now that you know this information. And please make a choice to share with your friends. The consequences will be good.
To your healthy, thriving, delightful life,
