At a recent visit, a patient shared with me that she was experiencing a bit more emotional stress than normal.
“What’s going on?”
She explained that her ex-boyfriend was interested in getting back together with her. “He’s a great guy bu…”
PAUSE!
I interrupted her before she finished that word “But.”
When we use the word, “but” it negates everything that came before it.
“He’s a good guy… but…”
“I love you… but…”
“You’re doing a good job… but…”
I had her close her eyes and take some deep breaths into her belly.
With her eyes closed and her belly breathing going on I talked her through the following quick visualization (which in her words was, “Useful, to the point, and pretty funny too!”)
Imagine yourself as an old lady, relaxing in your rocking chair, on the veranda of your country home. There is a light breeze ruffling your clothes away from your skin. The sun is setting over the field. You smell the home-made lemonade sitting on the table beside you, the taste of your last sip lingering on your tongue. You see the floral baskets hanging from the eave.
You hear the creak of the rocking chair beside you. You look over to see your love sitting there with you. Is it him?
Her eyes popped open.
“NOPE!”
“Okay. Good. Do you want to get back together with him?”
“No.”
I nodded.
Her body spoke the truth to her. And I’m not saying her response is a forever truth. Lives change. People change. Feelings change. But for her for right now, it’s a no to getting back together with her ex.
I think she knew this. Perhaps not consciously, on some level though. That’s why she tried to convince herself he was a good guy. And he very well may be. But. There’s that word again. He’s a good guy… but… he may not be the good guy for her.
It’s okay for things / people / jobs / places / foods to be good in general and not good for you specifically.
Again.
It’s okay for things / people / jobs / places / foods to be good in general AND not good for you specifically. (Tweet it!)
Our bodies are constantly talking to us.
It could be with physical symptoms. It could be with niggly, gnawing feelings in the pit of your stomach. It could be with anxiety or stress. I see sleep commonly disrupted when people are ignoring their truth or not following their intuition.
This visualization was a useful and to the point way to help this patient get the clarification she was looking for. She knew the answer, perhaps subconsciously. The exercise helped her admit and crystallize the truth.
I talk about two other methods of coming to TRUST your intuition here.
When it comes to making decisions I bet you can agree with me that brain logic is never as good as the messages from our body. Our minds can rationalize us into any decision.
He’s a good guy. We were together for a long time before we broke up. He’s a great cook. We enjoy similar activities.
But…
Her heart was saying, “No. For right now, he’s not the love I see myself being with.”
And that’s okay.
Today, see if you can adapt this visualization to a situation / decision that you’re in limbo about. When you do this, it’s important to engage the senses. If you review the exercise above, you’ll see I included all 5. What truth did your body show you? What did you feel? What did you learn about what you NEED to do?
To your healthy, thriving, delightful life,
