The Case of the Sticky-Note that was Too Small

One morning I opened the container of my fave brand of protein powder so I could make my post-work out anti-oxidant rich smoothie and...

Bleh. Something smelled off. Like plastic. Like toxic plastic. And worse? It tasted like it smelled. Double bleh.

I didn't really think too much of it, figuring that people have off days, maybe smoothies did too.

It happened again the next day. Bleh. Off. Toxic plastic. I had never had a problem with this brand before, and decided to go back to the store where I had purchased it.

I first went to the section where the natural health products are shelved. Only a pharmacist was there, and she couldn't help me.

I went next to the customer service desk. There was a nice lady there to whom I explained the situation, and asked to exchange the tub. She said that the manager of that section had left at 6:00 pm (it was 6:12 pm) but would be back tomorrow and that she (the manager) would be authorized to make the exchange.

The customer service representative took out a pen and a square sticky note and started collecting my information. She first wrote down the problem, and how I was hoping to swap the tub out for a different one.

Her writing became increasingly cramped and illegible as she took my contact info.

“I always start writing too big and never give myself the room to finish properly.” She promised she would re-write the note and that the manager would call me in the next day.

It’s been two years. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting that tub exchanged.

The exchange did fuel the question:

Why don’t we ever leave ourselves room?

(See what I did there?)

We often get ideas, which we either keep private or share. Those ideas may not fall into line with others’ ideas and somehow they get squashed, or limited, just as the lady’s writing did as it neared the edge of the sticky note.

The ideas get smaller and smaller until they are an indecipherable trace in our cognitive mesh.

We constantly shape ourselves to fit the borders and boundaries imposed by others (parents, teachers, society, the law, religion, you get the drift).

We behave in expected ways. We suppress our own needs and desires, because the needs and desires of other people are clearly more important.

Sarcasm aside, why do we do this?

Now I’m not saying go break the law and hurt people (since my mission is world peace, this is the opposite of what I'm trying to achieve.)

What I'm saying is give yourself the space (and the time) you need to be who you are.

Hoping to make a change?

The first step is to create the space for it. You want to learn a new language? Make space in your schedule to take a class. You want to loose weight? Make space in your fridge for vegetables.

Making space often means things have to go. If that means saying, “No,” more than so be it. Say yes to yourself more often.

If that means grabbing an extra sticky note so you can say what you're trying to say in a clear way, do it.

If that means dancing or screaming at the top of your lungs in a field of daisies, have at ‘er.

I just feel that the world would be a more loving and peaceful place if we all came from a place of self-love, and acceptance. With seven billion people plus on this earth, there isn't one right way. But there is enough space for everyone.

There isn't one box in which everyone will fit. And that’s okay. It is my humble opinion it makes the world beautiful. Just make sure your box is big enough for you.

You GOTTA make space for yourself.

Make space and time to be who you are. It is actually the most selfless thing you can do, because from there (from there only) you can look after others.

Here's to your space,

Dr. Tonia

P.S. What do you want to make more space for in your life. What is one action step you can take to wiggle in some space for it?