Someone I love recently told me that she had been waking up in the middle of the night panicking. I asked her what she was panicking about. “Oh, the band.”
“The band? I thought you liked being in the band.”
“Nope. I’ve never liked it.”
“But you’ve been playing with them for… decades!”
“Yep. I got recruited but I never wanted to do it.”
TWENTY YEARS!!
Here is a woman, so stubborn and so plagued by guilt that she sucked it up and stuck around playing in a community band she didn’t want to play in because she was drafted, as she describes.
However, joining the band 20 years ago was not mandatory. She could have said, “No, thank you,” right then and there.
She could have saved herself years of resentment and more recently the disrupted sleep and panic attacks. These were serious symptoms and her body was saying, “It’s time to move on!”
It’s OKAY to change your mind. Anyday. Anytime. No matter the reason. (Tweet it!)
When we decide against what is aligned in our Heart’s wisdom our body will give us information to help us course correct. For this woman, the resentment she felt every time she had to practice or perform was an attempt to get her attention. But she wasn’t listening. Her guilt was blocking the signal. It took a mid-sleep panic before she was willing to re-evaluate her commitment. That was a signal that she could no longer ignore.
It could be other symptoms for you.
Avoiding what you’re called to do could show up as depression, low energy, or restless sleeps.
Putting on a happy face to please others could show up as migraines or back pain.
Staying with the partner who you know isn’t right for you – even if they are perfect on paper, or the relationship is soooo comfortable – might show up as painful periods with debilitating nausea and even vomiting. Not very subtle, but often hard to identify the connection. Just like this woman and her 20 years in the band, most of my patients admit to me that they knew (like a deep soul knowing) very early on that the relationship wasn’t a good fit for them.
These are just a few examples of things I have seen in my practice. I have hundreds of other ones.
I know this to be true:
Our bodies are magical compasses that are constantly giving us information about the direction we are moving in. Our symptoms – when acknowledged and realized for what they are – help us course correct.
Even if it has been 20 years, it’s okay to change your mind. After this conversation this woman told the band director that she wouldn’t be back in the new year. She’s been sleeping like a baby ever since.
For Reflection:
So where are you saying, “Yes,” when you want to be saying, “No?”
Is there a possibility that your body is trying to get your attention about this discrepancy?
If you close your eyes and tune into your symptom, does it have a message for you?
